Well, we’ve made it through one holiday so far this year! It was kinda rough but we’re all alive. We went to Jeff’s mom’s for Thanksgiving. There were 19 adults and 11 children. It was chaos. Chaos on top of an un-baby proofed house and teething boys makes for well.. an exhausting 3 days. But I am glad Jeff had a nice time and got to see a lot of his family. That’s what counts right?
The boys are up to so much lately. They really are one laugh after another. They love to clap at everything. They wave at everything. They pucker up to kiss everything. Alex was especially fond of his cousin Addison’s doll this past weekend. It was hysterical! They love to throw balls. Everything is a “Bah”. Ben is really shaping up to be quite the lefty! Jeff of course, is thrilled by this prospect and is already looking for major league baseball scouts to get their opinions! LOL And their new favorite game is peek a boo! They love to cover their eyes and wait for one of us to yell.. PEEK A BOO!!! Sometimes they will even put blankets over their heads and pull them off. Alex.. well he loves to put everything on his head. Blankets, burp cloths, pants.. you name it!
Alex is not only just walking.. he is running. Like a mad man. Nate and Ben are so funny. They get up.. stand up. Take a couple steps. But then realize if they are going to catch him, they must still crawl. They are walking but not with the confidence that Alex has. But they are getting there so fast. It really amazes me. To think… at this time last year, Ben still didn’t weigh 5 pounds! Alex and Nate? They were about 6!!! To say they have come a long way in these 13 months is understatement! My preemies are not preemies anymore. They are 13 month old toddlers with no delays! It’s impossible for me to look at them and not get choked up!
Overall, things are busy. Time flies. This week has been no exception. Half of my Christmas shopping is done, the tree is up, the Christmas card is ordered. What next? More shopping this weekend and a party with the high order multiples group! This group is for families with triplets, quads, and quints. It really makes us feel “normal’. They understand the daily chaos for sure! Our group has adopted another high order multiple family in need, so the kids will be giving gifts to the children of the family in need.
I am so thankful that we are able to do this and to participate in three other exchanges like this. We’ve had an expensive year and precarious year with our job status uncertainty for sure, but we hope it’s behind us. Because we feel so fortunate, it’s very important for us to give back to those who are in need or just had a really shitty year. Health and happiness is fleeting. Who knows when I or someone I love may be on the other side of things. So for this year.. we share the wealth.
It is also at this time of year when I think about those still struggling to conceive the most. I had two really awful holiday seasons in 2006 and 2007. In December of 2006, my first pregnancy was diagnosed ectopic when my fallopian tube burst on Dec. 18th. I had surgery immediately that morning. I ended up back in the ER with my stitches hitting a nerve on Christmas Eve. I remember sitting on my living room couch in front of the Christmas tree a couple days after Christmas that year and Jeff saying to me… Don’t worry sweetie.. by this time next year, things will be much different for us. And he was right.
They were much worse.
After losing my other fallopian tube and my second pregnancy in September, we found out our first IVF was a chemical pregnancy on December 14th of 2007. I’d had it. I was a total mental, emotional basket case. I swore that was the last Christmas I was spending surrounded by and buying presents for nieces and nephews and children of our friends. Jeff and I both agreed, if we weren’t at least pregnant or knee deep in an adoption by Christmas 2008, we’d be spending our Christmas drowning in Mai Tai’s in Hawaii from now on.
I thank god everyday for the gifts I’ve been given in these boys. I just wanted to be a parent to A child. Any child. I didn’t care where he or she came from. Just one little child was all I wanted. So to all of you out there still struggling, my thoughts are with you now at this most difficult time of year. I hope that this is your last holiday season that you have to feel like this.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
A day in the life..
Here is a day in our life:
6:00ish AM: I hear monkey’s start to babble
6:10: Mom is in the shower
6:30: Mom is dressed and downstairs letting dogs out, feeding dogs, getting bottles (monkey’s are now full on chatting and yelling to be let out of cages)
6:45: Diaper changes for all. Bottles begin
7:00: playtime
7:15: Mom is out the door
7:30: Nanny Poppins arrives and Dad is out the door.
5:30ish: Mom and Dad are home. Monkey dinner begins. Ends with Mom and Dad wearing said dinner
6:00: PM Playtime with mom and dad
7:00: Bath time, books, and general get ready for bed
7:30: bottle
7:45: Bed
7:45: Mom starts her house chores, Dad starts his. Mom’s will include fold laundry, grocery shop, prepare tomorrows lunch, bottles, and dinner, clean up. Dad’s include Mafia wars and Monday night football. Occasionally trash night.
10:00: collapse into bed, maybe get 30 minutes of TV before sandman takes over.
Repeat.
It’s a crazy crazy day. But pretty typical for a working parent. You try to cram it all in and hope you don’t mess anyone up along the way. I miss the boys so much while I am gone all day. We’ve all started some separation anxiety. Especially Alex. He does not like it when we walk out of a room. AT ALL. And Nate and Ben aren’t far behind! I realized on Saturday that I too.. am suffering from separation anxiety. We went out to dinner for Jeff’s birthday. It was our first time out together since August 9th. Jeff’s mom and step dad came to visit to babysit for us. I had a horrible time leaving. Horrible. I’ve come to the conclusion that we no longer do anything together because our weekends are for the kids and only the kids. I feel like I have so little time with them during the week that I can’t possibly give up one waking moment during the weekend. But of course, as a result my marriage is suffering. Not that it’s bad or in trouble, but still, it’s not the same. I feel like we’re parents and not a married couple now. It does bum me out a bit. We had a nice time on Saturday night. A really nice time and made me think, we need to make more of an effort even if it’s just a “date night at home”. So we’re going to try.
But the boys are so amazing right now. Makes me want more kids! If only I could give birth to an 11 month old…. Hum..
6:00ish AM: I hear monkey’s start to babble
6:10: Mom is in the shower
6:30: Mom is dressed and downstairs letting dogs out, feeding dogs, getting bottles (monkey’s are now full on chatting and yelling to be let out of cages)
6:45: Diaper changes for all. Bottles begin
7:00: playtime
7:15: Mom is out the door
7:30: Nanny Poppins arrives and Dad is out the door.
5:30ish: Mom and Dad are home. Monkey dinner begins. Ends with Mom and Dad wearing said dinner
6:00: PM Playtime with mom and dad
7:00: Bath time, books, and general get ready for bed
7:30: bottle
7:45: Bed
7:45: Mom starts her house chores, Dad starts his. Mom’s will include fold laundry, grocery shop, prepare tomorrows lunch, bottles, and dinner, clean up. Dad’s include Mafia wars and Monday night football. Occasionally trash night.
10:00: collapse into bed, maybe get 30 minutes of TV before sandman takes over.
Repeat.
It’s a crazy crazy day. But pretty typical for a working parent. You try to cram it all in and hope you don’t mess anyone up along the way. I miss the boys so much while I am gone all day. We’ve all started some separation anxiety. Especially Alex. He does not like it when we walk out of a room. AT ALL. And Nate and Ben aren’t far behind! I realized on Saturday that I too.. am suffering from separation anxiety. We went out to dinner for Jeff’s birthday. It was our first time out together since August 9th. Jeff’s mom and step dad came to visit to babysit for us. I had a horrible time leaving. Horrible. I’ve come to the conclusion that we no longer do anything together because our weekends are for the kids and only the kids. I feel like I have so little time with them during the week that I can’t possibly give up one waking moment during the weekend. But of course, as a result my marriage is suffering. Not that it’s bad or in trouble, but still, it’s not the same. I feel like we’re parents and not a married couple now. It does bum me out a bit. We had a nice time on Saturday night. A really nice time and made me think, we need to make more of an effort even if it’s just a “date night at home”. So we’re going to try.
But the boys are so amazing right now. Makes me want more kids! If only I could give birth to an 11 month old…. Hum..
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Once again..
I am a total blog slacker.
GAWD I have been b.u.s.y.
Towards the end of September, we really swung into high gear trying to get the house ready for the boys 1st birthday party. That meant painting and organizing and shopping and planning. And in the end, we only got two rooms out of the 4 we wanted done. And we didn't even get to the hall either.
I was also getting ready to sell in the my first mom to mom sale. I only made about $400. That was a big disappointment to me and I won't sell in that sale again. It was SO much work getting ready for it, but on the up side.. Melissa and I got out of our houses for some adult time!
Then there was the BIG party!! OH BOY. My boys are 1!! I lived through it and I can't believe it! Of course they were all sick for the big day and there was some drama leading up to it with certain family members. But that's pretty much typical in the Johnson/LaLonde families. And the weather did NOT cooperate. We had planned to have it outside in a big tent, but it was way to cold. I was soooo nervous about having that many people in my house. But, in the end, it all went beautifully! We had about 60 people with the kids and my house held up fabulously. I had SO much food. After it was over I was like.. did anyone eat? LOL There were so many wonderful things about the day. The boys were amazing and LOVED their smash cakes. My best friend in the world drove 7 hours to be here with her 4 kids, as did my mom and grandma. All of Jeff's best friends came down from Midland and Bay City. We are so honored all of these people drove for hours to help us celebrate our miracles!
And since the party, we've all been sick, there's been Halloween parties, pictures... so much going on.
But what sat me down tonight finally? I really needed a place to just write out some feelings. I hate that I most feel compelled to blog when I am upset or something has royally pissed me off. But, it is what it is. And tonight, I am just heartbroken for a friend whose baby was just diagnosed with a horrible life debilitating and threatening disease called CIPO. Chronic Intestinal Pseudo Obstruction.
http://www.nationwidechildrens.org/GD/Templates/Pages/Childrens/GI/GILongContent.aspx?page=1748
CIPO is also very rare.. affecting like 1 out of like a million children.
The friend is a 'virtual' friend who I know through a chat board of women with multiples. It's an amazing group of girls and I've become so attached to them. And sadly, this is the second baby in our group that has been diagnosed with this condition this year. I've talked to a couple friends in the medical field and they can't believe that not only have I have heard of this disease and know what it is, but that I actually know of TWO babies with it in our small group of about 100 women.
The first baby, J.. is somewhat stable now after many many hospitalizations. But still has chronic pain. His mother was a great comfort to me in the early days of my pregnancy when we thought Ben and Nate might be mono amniotic. And then again when Ben was diagnosed with reflux. J and his brother were and she was by default.. an expert in the conditions and now, she is an expert on CIPO. She is remarkable. I think of her and her family every hour or every day. When J was finally diagnosed back in May, I was MIA due to the move, boys being sick, losing my job.. all that shit. I really feel a huge pit of guilt for not being there to be more supportive. If only thoughts and prayers were enough. Thank goodness J is stable right now, but many many tests and a very long road is still ahead for him.
And now.. poor baby G has been diagnosed with CIPO. And he is very.. well.. not stable. In fact, it's been one thing after another for this poor child and his family. When I read his mother's most recent post this afternoon, I literally lost it at my desk and had to go for a walk. Baby G has the sweetest face you could imagine and I can't bare to look at it knowing how sick he is.
I've had to ask myself tonight.. why am I so upset by this? I don't know this child or his mother other than over the computer. I think I have concluded that A) I am also the mother of young boys only a couple months older than G and a couple months younger than J. B) It's human nature to feel bad for a sick baby C) Having dealt with Ben's awful reflux and the hospitalization of all three of my boys at the same time last winter and knowing how upset and scary both of those situations were to me and my husband, I just can NOT fathom escalating those circumstances to what these mothers are dealing with.
It takes my breath away and knocks me on my knees. It makes me very angry with the powers that be. How can these babies be suffering so? How? Why?
I don't consider myself particularly religious. Although, I am catholic, did attend church regularly and probably will again when I can.. I consider myself more spiritual. Since this has all started with baby G, I find myself praying non stop for him. Several times a day.
So.. if you read this and you pray.. or you talk to some other higher power not of this earth.. pray for baby G and baby J. They need all the help they can get right now.
GAWD I have been b.u.s.y.
Towards the end of September, we really swung into high gear trying to get the house ready for the boys 1st birthday party. That meant painting and organizing and shopping and planning. And in the end, we only got two rooms out of the 4 we wanted done. And we didn't even get to the hall either.
I was also getting ready to sell in the my first mom to mom sale. I only made about $400. That was a big disappointment to me and I won't sell in that sale again. It was SO much work getting ready for it, but on the up side.. Melissa and I got out of our houses for some adult time!
Then there was the BIG party!! OH BOY. My boys are 1!! I lived through it and I can't believe it! Of course they were all sick for the big day and there was some drama leading up to it with certain family members. But that's pretty much typical in the Johnson/LaLonde families. And the weather did NOT cooperate. We had planned to have it outside in a big tent, but it was way to cold. I was soooo nervous about having that many people in my house. But, in the end, it all went beautifully! We had about 60 people with the kids and my house held up fabulously. I had SO much food. After it was over I was like.. did anyone eat? LOL There were so many wonderful things about the day. The boys were amazing and LOVED their smash cakes. My best friend in the world drove 7 hours to be here with her 4 kids, as did my mom and grandma. All of Jeff's best friends came down from Midland and Bay City. We are so honored all of these people drove for hours to help us celebrate our miracles!
And since the party, we've all been sick, there's been Halloween parties, pictures... so much going on.
But what sat me down tonight finally? I really needed a place to just write out some feelings. I hate that I most feel compelled to blog when I am upset or something has royally pissed me off. But, it is what it is. And tonight, I am just heartbroken for a friend whose baby was just diagnosed with a horrible life debilitating and threatening disease called CIPO. Chronic Intestinal Pseudo Obstruction.
http://www.nationwidechildrens.org/GD/Templates/Pages/Childrens/GI/GILongContent.aspx?page=1748
CIPO is also very rare.. affecting like 1 out of like a million children.
The friend is a 'virtual' friend who I know through a chat board of women with multiples. It's an amazing group of girls and I've become so attached to them. And sadly, this is the second baby in our group that has been diagnosed with this condition this year. I've talked to a couple friends in the medical field and they can't believe that not only have I have heard of this disease and know what it is, but that I actually know of TWO babies with it in our small group of about 100 women.
The first baby, J.. is somewhat stable now after many many hospitalizations. But still has chronic pain. His mother was a great comfort to me in the early days of my pregnancy when we thought Ben and Nate might be mono amniotic. And then again when Ben was diagnosed with reflux. J and his brother were and she was by default.. an expert in the conditions and now, she is an expert on CIPO. She is remarkable. I think of her and her family every hour or every day. When J was finally diagnosed back in May, I was MIA due to the move, boys being sick, losing my job.. all that shit. I really feel a huge pit of guilt for not being there to be more supportive. If only thoughts and prayers were enough. Thank goodness J is stable right now, but many many tests and a very long road is still ahead for him.
And now.. poor baby G has been diagnosed with CIPO. And he is very.. well.. not stable. In fact, it's been one thing after another for this poor child and his family. When I read his mother's most recent post this afternoon, I literally lost it at my desk and had to go for a walk. Baby G has the sweetest face you could imagine and I can't bare to look at it knowing how sick he is.
I've had to ask myself tonight.. why am I so upset by this? I don't know this child or his mother other than over the computer. I think I have concluded that A) I am also the mother of young boys only a couple months older than G and a couple months younger than J. B) It's human nature to feel bad for a sick baby C) Having dealt with Ben's awful reflux and the hospitalization of all three of my boys at the same time last winter and knowing how upset and scary both of those situations were to me and my husband, I just can NOT fathom escalating those circumstances to what these mothers are dealing with.
It takes my breath away and knocks me on my knees. It makes me very angry with the powers that be. How can these babies be suffering so? How? Why?
I don't consider myself particularly religious. Although, I am catholic, did attend church regularly and probably will again when I can.. I consider myself more spiritual. Since this has all started with baby G, I find myself praying non stop for him. Several times a day.
So.. if you read this and you pray.. or you talk to some other higher power not of this earth.. pray for baby G and baby J. They need all the help they can get right now.
Monday, September 14, 2009
The World According to Facebook
I looked up the definition of Facebook today.
Here is what Wikipedia has to say:Facebook is an American social networking website that is operated and privately owned by Facebook, Inc.[1] Users can add friends and send them messages, and update their personal profiles to notify friends about themselves. Additionally, users can join networks organized by city, workplace, school, and region.As far as I know.. It's intent is to be "friends" with people you are actually friends with or those you don't get to keep up with as much as you would like.
What it does not say is that Facebook is a place where those you are "friends" with should go to get ammunition to bitch and gossip about you. It does not say you should be or stay "friends" with those people you've had a falling out with or those commiserating with the person you've had the falling out with.
So you can probably guess where this post is going. I de-friended someone on Facebook. Someone who made it clear to me that they did not care to continue a friendship with me. Someone who.. as it came to my attention.. was making me the subject of some gossiping and mocking.
From what I am told, I royally pissed them, or at least her..off. Pissed her off to the point that this person actually made me the subject of her Facebook status ranting about how immature I am and that I need to GROW UP and continued the rant in a rather lenghty wall post. All because I defriended them and some other people associated with her.
Here is my question: Why on earth does this person feel she is still entitled to have access to my life and the lives of my family if she has made it clear to me she does not wish to continue our friendship? Why does she CARE to have access to a Facebook page of someone she hasn't seen in months and no longer speaks to???
I am VERY confused by this.
When we had our falling out, I was told how much I suck as a friend and human in many many different ways. Of course all of our mutual friends don't know everything she said to me because I didn't forward her emails to everyone we mutually know. And this is someone who I should allow continued access to my life AND the lives of my children????? Seriously??? It took these girls less than 24 hours to figure out I deleted them. So that really tells me I did the right thing. If someone deleted me... I would have no freakin clue. None. Unless I was constantly checking on them and their page.
I really refuse to leave myself or my family open to this degree of high school bullshit.
To say I am very disappointed in this person is an understatement. My first reaction to our falling out was to delete her off right then and there. But I didn't because I think there was part of me that was hoping it would blow over and we would be friends again. But it just hasn't. I did really enjoy my friendship with her and was sorry to see it end. I think I am still in a bit of shock that it mainly came to an end over the fact that my life has been completely chaotic this year and I really had no time for friendships. Any friendships. And for my part, I said if she couldn't understand that, it's best that we part ways now. I can't be the friend she obviously needs. I am not a stay at home mom with one child. You can't compare apples and oranges. Enough said.
So back to the reality of where we are at. To add to the list of insults that were hurled at me before, now I can add the list from the FB rant that took place the other night. I am immature for deleting her and her friends and..... last but not least.. I need to GROW UP.
Really? I need to grow up? Wasn't she the one forwarding my emails to god only knows how many people last month when we were hashing this out? And isn't she the one who set her FB status to a completely idiotic rant about me and would let it die on the wall? What is ironic is that apparently I am the 4th person to delete her off FB in the last month or so. I have to wonder if I am the only one of the 4 that pissed her off enough to get my own status update and wall post on her page? And if I am the 4th person, then perhaps it's time to think about why that might be. All 4 of us can't be immature can we? Do all 4 of us need to grow up?
The last thing I am going to say on this subject is... NO. You are absolutely NOT entitled to nor do I owe you any kind of access to my life and the lives of my husband and children. My Facebook page is just that. MINE. The place I chat with my family and friends. The place where I upload photo's of my children so I can keep up with friends near and far. And if I have a bad day and I want to vent about it on my page or whatever the hell I want to do, I want to do so without having to worry that someone out there is reading it and using it against me or as their fucking entertainment for the day. It's fucking Facebook. Does it really mean that much to you to be on my page?? Someone you can't stand?? There isn't one part of me that thinks I did the wrong thing. In fact, you proved that I did the right thing and should have done it sooner.
And if you still feel this entitlement to my life, then telling you to grow up... well that is the least of your problems.
Here is what Wikipedia has to say:Facebook is an American social networking website that is operated and privately owned by Facebook, Inc.[1] Users can add friends and send them messages, and update their personal profiles to notify friends about themselves. Additionally, users can join networks organized by city, workplace, school, and region.As far as I know.. It's intent is to be "friends" with people you are actually friends with or those you don't get to keep up with as much as you would like.
What it does not say is that Facebook is a place where those you are "friends" with should go to get ammunition to bitch and gossip about you. It does not say you should be or stay "friends" with those people you've had a falling out with or those commiserating with the person you've had the falling out with.
So you can probably guess where this post is going. I de-friended someone on Facebook. Someone who made it clear to me that they did not care to continue a friendship with me. Someone who.. as it came to my attention.. was making me the subject of some gossiping and mocking.
From what I am told, I royally pissed them, or at least her..off. Pissed her off to the point that this person actually made me the subject of her Facebook status ranting about how immature I am and that I need to GROW UP and continued the rant in a rather lenghty wall post. All because I defriended them and some other people associated with her.
Here is my question: Why on earth does this person feel she is still entitled to have access to my life and the lives of my family if she has made it clear to me she does not wish to continue our friendship? Why does she CARE to have access to a Facebook page of someone she hasn't seen in months and no longer speaks to???
I am VERY confused by this.
When we had our falling out, I was told how much I suck as a friend and human in many many different ways. Of course all of our mutual friends don't know everything she said to me because I didn't forward her emails to everyone we mutually know. And this is someone who I should allow continued access to my life AND the lives of my children????? Seriously??? It took these girls less than 24 hours to figure out I deleted them. So that really tells me I did the right thing. If someone deleted me... I would have no freakin clue. None. Unless I was constantly checking on them and their page.
I really refuse to leave myself or my family open to this degree of high school bullshit.
To say I am very disappointed in this person is an understatement. My first reaction to our falling out was to delete her off right then and there. But I didn't because I think there was part of me that was hoping it would blow over and we would be friends again. But it just hasn't. I did really enjoy my friendship with her and was sorry to see it end. I think I am still in a bit of shock that it mainly came to an end over the fact that my life has been completely chaotic this year and I really had no time for friendships. Any friendships. And for my part, I said if she couldn't understand that, it's best that we part ways now. I can't be the friend she obviously needs. I am not a stay at home mom with one child. You can't compare apples and oranges. Enough said.
So back to the reality of where we are at. To add to the list of insults that were hurled at me before, now I can add the list from the FB rant that took place the other night. I am immature for deleting her and her friends and..... last but not least.. I need to GROW UP.
Really? I need to grow up? Wasn't she the one forwarding my emails to god only knows how many people last month when we were hashing this out? And isn't she the one who set her FB status to a completely idiotic rant about me and would let it die on the wall? What is ironic is that apparently I am the 4th person to delete her off FB in the last month or so. I have to wonder if I am the only one of the 4 that pissed her off enough to get my own status update and wall post on her page? And if I am the 4th person, then perhaps it's time to think about why that might be. All 4 of us can't be immature can we? Do all 4 of us need to grow up?
The last thing I am going to say on this subject is... NO. You are absolutely NOT entitled to nor do I owe you any kind of access to my life and the lives of my husband and children. My Facebook page is just that. MINE. The place I chat with my family and friends. The place where I upload photo's of my children so I can keep up with friends near and far. And if I have a bad day and I want to vent about it on my page or whatever the hell I want to do, I want to do so without having to worry that someone out there is reading it and using it against me or as their fucking entertainment for the day. It's fucking Facebook. Does it really mean that much to you to be on my page?? Someone you can't stand?? There isn't one part of me that thinks I did the wrong thing. In fact, you proved that I did the right thing and should have done it sooner.
And if you still feel this entitlement to my life, then telling you to grow up... well that is the least of your problems.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Mama
That's me!!!
Ok..I have waited a really really long time to hear that. Really long. Who was it? Well.. it was none other than Alexander. The Alexgator. It made what was pretty much a really long crappy day totally worth breathing. And I am having trouble breathing today, let me tell you!
I am sicker than a dog right now. Sinus infection, cough, runny nose, watery eyes, pounding head, no sleep.. you name it. I went to a training class today at work and as they were setting up, the lady setting up the computer says..'gee Jen.. you look really tired and well.. out of it". Then I opened my mouth and revealed my sexy raspy (ok.. horse) voice and she goes.. ewww!!! You're sick! oh yeah. I really frankly don't remember the last time I felt this shitty. Yesterday, I was a total deadbeat parent. I was unfit to care for the boys. Today, I was "that person" at work who I cringe at. the person that should not have been at work and put others at risk to my plague. But the sad thing is.. first of all.. I only get so many sick days and I feel like I need to save them in case my nanny gets sick or the boys are so sick I need to take them to the Dr. And second.. I was seriously in no condition to take care of them again. Going to work was the easy way out.
So I muddled through a half day of report specs (high cost claimants and pharmacy data) and the second half of my day was spent on Diagnostic Cost Group'ers. ohhh the excitement! LOL And then I weathered my way on my hour commute. Got some shitty news along the way (but that's another post entirely). But I made it home to my three gorgeous, adorable, snotty nose, coughing love muffins.
Jeff started feeding them dinner tonight in the high chairs. I was talking to them as he was feeding. I went to leave the kitchen for a minute and when I turned my back to leave... Alex let out a blood curtling scream and twisted himself to follow me out of the room (that's a pretty normal occurance) and started yelling MAMA MAMMAMAMMA...
I know.. he's young. 10 months and not quite two weeks. But it seemed so...deliberate. Jeff and I both saw the look on his face and he knew what he was saying. This child is so smart that he scares us. Had it been Nate or Ben, I would have thought.. babbling. But Alex? He knows. They've all been babbling Dada for awhile now but this was the first time I have heard Mama.
Then, when we were putting them to bed. I was getting bibs and bottles organized standing at their dresser and he was fussying as he crawled over to me. Grabbed my pants leg and pulled up and he did it again.. mama mama mama...
Anyway.. it was quite the moment for me. Mama. I have waited to hear that for so long. It was such a moment. It made a sick miserable day A Ok.
ok.. I have to go cry again.
Ok..I have waited a really really long time to hear that. Really long. Who was it? Well.. it was none other than Alexander. The Alexgator. It made what was pretty much a really long crappy day totally worth breathing. And I am having trouble breathing today, let me tell you!
I am sicker than a dog right now. Sinus infection, cough, runny nose, watery eyes, pounding head, no sleep.. you name it. I went to a training class today at work and as they were setting up, the lady setting up the computer says..'gee Jen.. you look really tired and well.. out of it". Then I opened my mouth and revealed my sexy raspy (ok.. horse) voice and she goes.. ewww!!! You're sick! oh yeah. I really frankly don't remember the last time I felt this shitty. Yesterday, I was a total deadbeat parent. I was unfit to care for the boys. Today, I was "that person" at work who I cringe at. the person that should not have been at work and put others at risk to my plague. But the sad thing is.. first of all.. I only get so many sick days and I feel like I need to save them in case my nanny gets sick or the boys are so sick I need to take them to the Dr. And second.. I was seriously in no condition to take care of them again. Going to work was the easy way out.
So I muddled through a half day of report specs (high cost claimants and pharmacy data) and the second half of my day was spent on Diagnostic Cost Group'ers. ohhh the excitement! LOL And then I weathered my way on my hour commute. Got some shitty news along the way (but that's another post entirely). But I made it home to my three gorgeous, adorable, snotty nose, coughing love muffins.
Jeff started feeding them dinner tonight in the high chairs. I was talking to them as he was feeding. I went to leave the kitchen for a minute and when I turned my back to leave... Alex let out a blood curtling scream and twisted himself to follow me out of the room (that's a pretty normal occurance) and started yelling MAMA MAMMAMAMMA...
I know.. he's young. 10 months and not quite two weeks. But it seemed so...deliberate. Jeff and I both saw the look on his face and he knew what he was saying. This child is so smart that he scares us. Had it been Nate or Ben, I would have thought.. babbling. But Alex? He knows. They've all been babbling Dada for awhile now but this was the first time I have heard Mama.
Then, when we were putting them to bed. I was getting bibs and bottles organized standing at their dresser and he was fussying as he crawled over to me. Grabbed my pants leg and pulled up and he did it again.. mama mama mama...
Anyway.. it was quite the moment for me. Mama. I have waited to hear that for so long. It was such a moment. It made a sick miserable day A Ok.
ok.. I have to go cry again.
Monday, August 24, 2009
10 months!!
I can’t really believe that 10 months has FLOWN by this fast. Everyone always says that your children grow up to fast and man.. they were not kidding!
The house is sure alive with the sounds of babies these day! Or.. should I call them ‘pre-toddlers’? They boys are SO busy.
Benj…. Is crawling crawling crawling but still a bit slower than his two brothers. But make no mistake.. he can sure get around in lightening speed too! He loves to play with the toys. Loves both our Laugh and Learn and Leap Frog tables, the cruise and crawl jungle.. but most of all.. he LOVEs his inflatable roller and LOVE LOVE LOVES his jumperoo. I am seriously going to post a video of him in the jumperoo. He is HYSTERICAL. He gets going something wild. Whenever someone comes the house, we must have Ben put on his show for them! He is crazy pants in that thing!
He is really enjoying his finger foods and will eat pretty much whatever I put in front of him. He has SEVEN count them, seven teeth! Little piranha!!
And Ben has surprised me. Ben… is the most loving mama’s boy of the three. He is such an amazing cuddler. Loves to hug and be held. If you want a snuggle baby.. he’s it. It’s odd to say.. but Ben is the baby I think I felt least bonded with in the beginning. He had such awful reflux that Jeff was the only one who could stand to feed him for a good couple months. He was in such terrible pain that he would just scream and flail during every feed. My mom and I just couldn’t do it without crying. But the last couple months, wow.. he’s a total mama’s boy!! I love it! He is just a sweetheart. So good natured and loving. He really is an angel baby.
Na Nate. Yes.. that is what I call Nate 95% of the time. I just always say.. Na Nate! He too.. is the loving, good natured angel baby type. Sooo cuddly.. so sensitive! You can hurt Nate’s feelings very easily. The other day, I went to go get Alex to change him and I held out my arms to get Alex to reach for me, Nate was next to him. They both reached for me. I picked up Alex and Nate started crying so hard!! It was terrible!! Poor sweetheart! I had to go give him a kiss too. Nate and Ben are sooo much alike. But go figure.. they’re identical twins! But Nate is a bit more adventurous than Benj. He tries his best to keep up with Alex and usually does a pretty good job. He pulls up in his crib, pulls up on everything. Crawls everywhere. Fast! He also loves the jumperoo, learning tables and this standing piano thing we have. I don’t even know what the name is for all our toys!
He is my picky eater. He sure loves his cheerios and puffs, but really doesn’t want anything to do with eating other finger foods. Not like his piggy brothers! I always say.. he is going to be my peanut butter and jelly baby! He too, has SEVEN teeth!
Both Nate and Ben LOVE it when I sing to them. They are totally captive audience. We sing patty cake, itsy bitsy spider and the ABC song non stop. They love love love that patty cake song!
And then there is Alex. Alexgator. What a personality he has become. OMG. Alex was the first mama’s boy of the group. No one would do for him but me. And he was very vocal about that. He is my strongest personality for sure of the three. Now… Alex is way to adventurous and curious to be contained. You can’t keep a wave on the sand right? That’s Alex! He is EVERYWHERE. Don’t turn your head folks.. there goes the whirling dervish! Precocious is the word for Alex for sure. He loves to touch everything. Put everything in his mouth. He can crawl like lightening and when he reaches his destination, sitting and looking at it is not good enough. He wants to stand ON it. He took his first steps on his 10 month birthday. Three big steps between a chair and a couch. Clumsy yes.. but he sure did it!
He has six teeth and will eat anything and everything. He has a hollow leg I am sure. I can’t believe what he eats and he is still tall and skinny! He loves to hear stories and be talked to like he’s an adult. He high fives and points. He is non stop entertainment for sure!
But he does have a soft side too. Loves his pacifier, loves to be held. One look into those bright blue eyes and anyone would melt.
We are enjoying them so much. I hate putting them to bed every night. I want to keep them up! Of course, I wish they didn’t want to party by 5 am every day.. but the alternative.. a quiet house.. just would not seem right! We love it the way it is!
The house is sure alive with the sounds of babies these day! Or.. should I call them ‘pre-toddlers’? They boys are SO busy.
Benj…. Is crawling crawling crawling but still a bit slower than his two brothers. But make no mistake.. he can sure get around in lightening speed too! He loves to play with the toys. Loves both our Laugh and Learn and Leap Frog tables, the cruise and crawl jungle.. but most of all.. he LOVEs his inflatable roller and LOVE LOVE LOVES his jumperoo. I am seriously going to post a video of him in the jumperoo. He is HYSTERICAL. He gets going something wild. Whenever someone comes the house, we must have Ben put on his show for them! He is crazy pants in that thing!
He is really enjoying his finger foods and will eat pretty much whatever I put in front of him. He has SEVEN count them, seven teeth! Little piranha!!
And Ben has surprised me. Ben… is the most loving mama’s boy of the three. He is such an amazing cuddler. Loves to hug and be held. If you want a snuggle baby.. he’s it. It’s odd to say.. but Ben is the baby I think I felt least bonded with in the beginning. He had such awful reflux that Jeff was the only one who could stand to feed him for a good couple months. He was in such terrible pain that he would just scream and flail during every feed. My mom and I just couldn’t do it without crying. But the last couple months, wow.. he’s a total mama’s boy!! I love it! He is just a sweetheart. So good natured and loving. He really is an angel baby.
Na Nate. Yes.. that is what I call Nate 95% of the time. I just always say.. Na Nate! He too.. is the loving, good natured angel baby type. Sooo cuddly.. so sensitive! You can hurt Nate’s feelings very easily. The other day, I went to go get Alex to change him and I held out my arms to get Alex to reach for me, Nate was next to him. They both reached for me. I picked up Alex and Nate started crying so hard!! It was terrible!! Poor sweetheart! I had to go give him a kiss too. Nate and Ben are sooo much alike. But go figure.. they’re identical twins! But Nate is a bit more adventurous than Benj. He tries his best to keep up with Alex and usually does a pretty good job. He pulls up in his crib, pulls up on everything. Crawls everywhere. Fast! He also loves the jumperoo, learning tables and this standing piano thing we have. I don’t even know what the name is for all our toys!
He is my picky eater. He sure loves his cheerios and puffs, but really doesn’t want anything to do with eating other finger foods. Not like his piggy brothers! I always say.. he is going to be my peanut butter and jelly baby! He too, has SEVEN teeth!
Both Nate and Ben LOVE it when I sing to them. They are totally captive audience. We sing patty cake, itsy bitsy spider and the ABC song non stop. They love love love that patty cake song!
And then there is Alex. Alexgator. What a personality he has become. OMG. Alex was the first mama’s boy of the group. No one would do for him but me. And he was very vocal about that. He is my strongest personality for sure of the three. Now… Alex is way to adventurous and curious to be contained. You can’t keep a wave on the sand right? That’s Alex! He is EVERYWHERE. Don’t turn your head folks.. there goes the whirling dervish! Precocious is the word for Alex for sure. He loves to touch everything. Put everything in his mouth. He can crawl like lightening and when he reaches his destination, sitting and looking at it is not good enough. He wants to stand ON it. He took his first steps on his 10 month birthday. Three big steps between a chair and a couch. Clumsy yes.. but he sure did it!
He has six teeth and will eat anything and everything. He has a hollow leg I am sure. I can’t believe what he eats and he is still tall and skinny! He loves to hear stories and be talked to like he’s an adult. He high fives and points. He is non stop entertainment for sure!
But he does have a soft side too. Loves his pacifier, loves to be held. One look into those bright blue eyes and anyone would melt.
We are enjoying them so much. I hate putting them to bed every night. I want to keep them up! Of course, I wish they didn’t want to party by 5 am every day.. but the alternative.. a quiet house.. just would not seem right! We love it the way it is!
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