Mama

That's me!!!

Ok..I have waited a really really long time to hear that. Really long. Who was it? Well.. it was none other than Alexander. The Alexgator. It made what was pretty much a really long crappy day totally worth breathing. And I am having trouble breathing today, let me tell you!

I am sicker than a dog right now. Sinus infection, cough, runny nose, watery eyes, pounding head, no sleep.. you name it. I went to a training class today at work and as they were setting up, the lady setting up the computer says..'gee Jen.. you look really tired and well.. out of it". Then I opened my mouth and revealed my sexy raspy (ok.. horse) voice and she goes.. ewww!!! You're sick! oh yeah. I really frankly don't remember the last time I felt this shitty. Yesterday, I was a total deadbeat parent. I was unfit to care for the boys. Today, I was "that person" at work who I cringe at. the person that should not have been at work and put others at risk to my plague. But the sad thing is.. first of all.. I only get so many sick days and I feel like I need to save them in case my nanny gets sick or the boys are so sick I need to take them to the Dr. And second.. I was seriously in no condition to take care of them again. Going to work was the easy way out.

So I muddled through a half day of report specs (high cost claimants and pharmacy data) and the second half of my day was spent on Diagnostic Cost Group'ers. ohhh the excitement! LOL And then I weathered my way on my hour commute. Got some shitty news along the way (but that's another post entirely). But I made it home to my three gorgeous, adorable, snotty nose, coughing love muffins.

Jeff started feeding them dinner tonight in the high chairs. I was talking to them as he was feeding. I went to leave the kitchen for a minute and when I turned my back to leave... Alex let out a blood curtling scream and twisted himself to follow me out of the room (that's a pretty normal occurance) and started yelling MAMA MAMMAMAMMA...

I know.. he's young. 10 months and not quite two weeks. But it seemed so...deliberate. Jeff and I both saw the look on his face and he knew what he was saying. This child is so smart that he scares us. Had it been Nate or Ben, I would have thought.. babbling. But Alex? He knows. They've all been babbling Dada for awhile now but this was the first time I have heard Mama.

Then, when we were putting them to bed. I was getting bibs and bottles organized standing at their dresser and he was fussying as he crawled over to me. Grabbed my pants leg and pulled up and he did it again.. mama mama mama...

Anyway.. it was quite the moment for me. Mama. I have waited to hear that for so long. It was such a moment. It made a sick miserable day A Ok.

ok.. I have to go cry again.